Permission to be really polarized in this.
Untruths slay the soul.
The story you tell yourself, that has been running you, slays the soul.
In Maximum Growth group coaching classes, I often say I like to hear your story to provide a level of context for your experience. It helps me get a little into your current perspective.
So then instead of me projecting what I think is going on, I see, feel and hear it from you.
But let’s deep dive into a story.
All stories have a nightmare / fantasy dynamic, you usually consciously share the nightmare and withhold the fantasy.
Each time you share, you're blind to the other side of what happens, you're blind to your own co-creation. You separate the mind, and as a result, slay the soul (ouch).
That was me 2 months ago. Oh the stories I was telling myself about my family, myself as a parent, my relationship, where I was in life. It was a catastrophic soul slay!
My mum had revealed to me on a recent trip that she felt hurt each time I went to see my biological mum. I remember feeling their hurt and deciding not to see my mum again (I didn't see her from 9 until 16).
I began to build this resentment towards my mum, “how could she not just put her own feelings aside as a parent, as an adult.”
This then started to snowball with all these other moments throughout my childhood and adolescence where I perceived she had put her needs before mine.
This snowball didn't stop. It turned into an avalanche.
And I couldn’t seem to stop myself from being angry. Bitter towards her as a parent. The byproduct was self-righteousness towards my own parenting style.
I started to notice that the light within me was fading. And fading fast.
I no longer felt connected to myself, my work, my energy was dropping, my body started showing symptoms in the form of a sore throat (thank you very much body).
Then one day, seeing my daughter, and noticing that the pride within me was impacting our relationship dynamic, I made a decision that I would look at my relationship with my Mum differently, to help my long-term relationship with my daughter. In turn, would also help me with my relationship with myself.
I realized that being connected to my daughter and my own soul was way more important than holding onto this story.
So I got to work in the way I know delivered deep transformation and healing. I applied the Demartini Method.
I wanted to take accountability for my co-creating in my childhood. And that no one is responsible for me, other than myself. My mum might have made the decision to leave but I also wanted her to leave too. I also chose not to see her for all those years and I could have, if I wanted to, chosen something different.
What I discovered was the depths of connection I found within myself, with an abundance of solitude at home, going deep into my own mind.
I did weird things when I was home on the holidays and on my own. I would build these incredible pyramid towers of cards and I would focus on this for hours with packs of cards and build it up to 9 levels high and an arm span wide (weirdo right?!). The concentration, persistence and dedication to the outcome has definitely helped me in my work, to be in the zone and not get distracted.
I became closer with my mum that raised me, and raised me is the best way to describe her parenting. She wanted me and was fighting to keep me close. She lifted me to have a higher purpose, a spiritual path that I know for certain I would not have discovered in the presence of my birth mum (very different values you see).
You see, after doing the work there is a new story. It's inspiring to share, it’s energizing to think about.
After doing the work it is as if someone switched the light back on, and I am all in with my business, I feel more present with Bonnie, I am able to focus (my executive centre is firing peeps).
Tim Cahill, an adventurer and writer, says “I put my life on the line to save my soul.”
And this is so true. What kind of life are we living if we are not connected to the light within us? What kind of live are we living if we are playing small on the impact we know we can have on humanity or another human being?
That’s our purpose, to discover our light, and then shine it on the world.
How connected are you with your light right now? Do you feel you could be shining brighter? ?
So, if you want to master your life and your light, then you have to be congruent with your stories. That’s the truth.
Because damn, there is nothing more nourishing than a soulful connection with yourself.
If you’re struggling with a soulful connection or you want to have more personal power and professional purpose, then consider our Power Walkshop, where you’ll experience 5 powerful days discovering the power of presence, the power of the mind, the body, nature and the universe within you. I promise it will be life-changing 5 days.
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With love and light illuminating you,
Leadership Coach & Master Certified Demartini Method Facilitator
Helping leaders to level up using a transformational mindset work.
P.S. If you’re not connected, come join class, it's a small investment for a massive return to your light within you.